By now, tales have spread far and wide about the ongoing battles between Hazel and her stuffed toy, Blue Dog. The latest bout happened this morning, and, we’re sorry to say, had to be ruled in favor of Blue Dog due to some Mike Tyson-inspired tactics on Hazel’s part.
(I believe in most organized sports, it’s still illegal to bite the face of one’s opponent. On the other hand, my grandmother plays a mean type of Bridge where that happens all the time.)
We also had another visitor, our friend Kim, fly in from San Francisco for the weekend. Naturally we took the opportunity to photograph her with Hazel.
Note to the weak of stomach: Please do not read the rest of this post.
Okay, now that they’re gone, I’ll tell you something that has me weirded out. I mentioned that last week Hazel had a cold. Our pediatrician gave us a squeeze-bulb thing to suck the snot out of her nose. Okay, fine, makes sense. Plus, I had seen our friends Allen and Elaine do it to Owen when he was a baby. Our pediatrician also told us to “squirt a little breast milk up there” before suctioning.
While it would be inappropriate for me to surreptitiously film Elise hunched over Hazel, trying to squirt milk up her nose, can I just say that it’s both weird and hilarious? Other peoples’ difficulties are always the funniest.
Then, in an attempt to seem like responsible parents, Elise and I went in for the H1N1 vaccine. Turns out there are two methods of delivery. The shot, which we’re all familiar with, and the type they had at our doctors office, where they stick a plastic syringe up your nose and fire off whatever it is right into your sinuses. So, serves me right for laughing about the breast milk thing, doesn’t it?
It seemed more invasive than a straight-up injection, due to the novelty of the method. I’m sure if I took vitamins nasally every day, I wouldn’t be weirded out by it. But I don’t, and I am. I just hope it’s a real vaccine, and not a practical joke they’re doing for a hidden-camera show.